THIS MADE ME LAUGH OUT LOUD..

THIS MADE ME LAUGH OUT LOUD..

Men can now use penis glue for 'real sex without side effects' - but it won't prevent pregnancy or STDs

Jiftip has been four years in the making, but it apparently only protects 'pleasure'

http://www.mirror.co.uk/tech/men-can-now-use-penis-10923746

History is full of bizarre forms of contraceptives.

In ancient China, women would drink quicksilver on an empty stomach to avoid pregnancy - and wind up with mercury poisoning instead.

In the Middle Ages, it was believed a woman should have a post-coital wee in the same spot as where a she-wolf had recently urinated, which sounds both a hassle and potentially very dangerous - what if the wolf came back?

Happily in this day and age, there are many forms of medically sound contraception available to us.

None of them are perfect, but they're better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick. Except, perhaps, for the Jiftip, which we're hoping does not catch on.

What is the Jiftip?

Good question.

The new product describes itself as a "feel shield" and sounds essentially like glue for the penis.

It promises a lot, having been in development for four years. The top layer is polyurethane film, the adhesive layer is used in speciality skin bandages, but with a maximum grip, according to the website.

As for what it actually does, the makers say: "Where you're open, Jiftip has you covered. Slam the door on foreign invaders and trap those few eager baby-seeds until you're ready to let them go.

"NOTE: Jiftip is a great alternative to penis clamps and diapers for mild male urinary incontinence."

Our horror aside that something called a penis clamp exists, it seems from the above that the Jiftip is saying it can protect against STDs and pregnancy.

Except it gets confusing on the site's FAQ section, where is says, "Jiftip only protects pleasure and convenience, not STI's or pregnancy."

So what's the point in it, exactly?

We had a look at the reviews to see what others had to say.

"'There's got to be a better way', I thought to myself after my girlfriend had to come off the pill and I was resigned to the fact I'd have to start wrapping my manhood in rubber straitjackets," wrote one charming man going by the name of Sam.

Sam was a fan, but a disgruntled user called Adam wrote, "Do not use Jiftip. I tried, it failed. Highly un-recommended."

But if you're still on the fence about going down the Jiftip route, just be aware that official testing is several years away, so maybe she-wolf wee is a safer bet.
http://www.mirror.co.uk/tech/men-can-now-use-penis-10923746